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In business and in life, your ability to persuade others can mean the
difference between success and failure, or between mere success and spectacular success.…

Persuade With Power
Kurt Mortensen
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   Great persuaders are congrooent, but what is congrooence? When things match, we don’t notice, but if something seems off, it grabs our attention either consciously or subconsciously. Just like the misspellings in the first sentence of this paragraph. You noticed it and your mind told you something was wrong with that word. 

Congruence is when your words match your actions. Agreement and harmony between what you say and what you do are paramount to instilling trust in those you work with. The more consistent and congruent you are in every aspect of your life, the more honest and genuine you’re perceived to be. 

If you believe in your message, you’ll practice what you preach. If you practice what you preach, you’ll be more authentic, and the door of trust will then swing wide open for you. When you possess congruency, there’s no need to manipulate or camouflage your behavior.


  Are you congruent with your history, your last interaction, and your reputation? Does your nonverbal behavior match your actions? Are your emotions congruent with your message? What are your audience’s expectations of you and your message? 

When your past history and your message don’t match, flags of incongruity will wave in your audience’s face. Suspicion will be roused and your audience will start to look for things that are wrong with you or your message. This inconsistency will decrease your ability to gain influence and trust. 

That’s because humans are natural lie detectors. When we attempt to fake congruence, we must also spend our time and energy trying to fake our message.

 
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 You have to be careful in how you explain and exhibit your credibility. If you launch into a laundry list of your accomplishments or of your education and titles, you might be perceived as a self-centered. Take advantage of less direct or less self-proclaiming ways to show your audience how competent you are.

For example, you can hang your degrees on the wall, have someone else give a brief bio, or have someone else offer his recommendation of you. You can borrow credibility from others using a testimonial or statement from them. Credibility can also be defined as “having expertise, trustworthiness, goodwill, dynamism, extroversion, sociability, composure, or expertise.”(7)

 Trust builds with dependability. Do you have a track record? Are you a person of your word? When you make an appointment, are you there on time? When you commit to doing something for someone, does it get done as promised? Do you think they will forget?
They usually just won’t bring it up.

When you make a promise, do you make sure it is kept, or are you full of excuses and alibis. Be reliable and follow through with all your promises. Credibility is “the single biggest variable under the speaker’s control during the presentation.”(8)

 Another way to boost your credibility is to present yourself in a calm, organized, and authoritative manner. Being overly emotional or flustered throws your credibility out the window. Consider the most highly successful attorneys or CEOs.


No matter how rushed or pressured they are, you don’t ever see them running into the room....

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